Ok, it's almost 11pm and I'm at home sitting in my scrubs from work, (either prune juice or brown gravy has stained my pants) playing my Superman Returns DVD in the background (gotta love Kevin Spacey!) and all I can think about at the moment is how much Oprah sucks.
I realize that the timing for this post isn't the greatest. She just opened a school in Africa for underpriviledged girls, most of who are affected by the AIDS virus. That is fantastic, really! The facts that "suck" about Oprah are those which have happened in the U.S., especially what the American public has viewed on her TV show. My top 5 reasons for Oprah "sucking" are as follows -
1. She believes in everything, and therefore believes in nothing.
What a great example to set for the 8 million viewers who watch her show daily. Laud the benefits of Christianity (the music, especially. She has a favorite gospel choir, you know.), but don't forget the Dalai Lama's teachings, how to practice meditation, and get a few sentimental Muslim guests in the mix, too. How do you improve your "spirit" when you can't pick a way to do it?
2. She believes in a communal "spirit" shared by everyone.
Oprah and her friend Gail took a promotional tour of the U.S. and during the last episode which featured this trip, and after she had visited professional celebrity impersonators, an Ahmish community, had crashed weddings, etc (I didn't watch every episode), she had the following concluding statement - "We all have the same heart". Bullcrap. Oprah, you just crossed an entire nation of 300 million people, populated by immigrants from all over the world, with differeing religious backgrounds, financial status, age, skin color (the list goes on and on)....yet we're all the same? How about this statment - "We're all ruled by the same God, who gave us each our own individual soul"? No wait, that's too conservative...it would never go over on Oprah's watch.
3. She has a magazine devoted to her and what she loves.
Why should her personal interests/hobbies/favorite purchases matter to anyone? Talk about a severe case of narcissism. If I had created a magazine devoted to my loves (Monty Python/my new clarinet purchase/books on theology) it would tank in two days, tops. Yet this magazine, half of it being advertisements and the other half being a list of her favorite things (which you too can buy!) skyrockets every month! My knowledge of Oprah's favorite slippers at the moment does not improve my life in any way whatsoever.
4. She regularly lists the risks of being married and how it isn't for her.
With how long she's been in a relationship with this Stedman guy, marriage apparently doesn't apply to her. That would be one hell of a prenup, I guess. One reason marriage won't work? - The cheating factor. Believe me, Oprah, you have a much higher risk of being cheated on when there's no reason for commitment than when you have the legal protection against it that comes with being married. She's won't buy the cow when she can get the milk for free (which you can, too!). WOOHOO!
5. Her lack of charity except when it benefits her self-promotion or TV show ratings.
Yeah, that's a pretty bold statement. See above regarding the timing of this post and reason. Oprah recently made a statement regarding giving more of her $ away, saying (not completely verbatim here), "My being destitute will not help anything". Oprah, no one is asking you to become destitute! And by the way, what is being destitute in your opinion? Because to a lot of the American public, living in a 1-bedroom apartment and eating mac and cheese every once in a while would not consitute being labeled as "destitute". For someone who is worth over a billion dollars, would an extra $1 million to charity sting so much? Sure, you can give gift cards (for the purpose alone to give to charity) to your audience, promote it in advance, have every news website and tv news organization talk about it before your show's air date, and then bask in the ratings glory. Oprah, I beg you - give to a cause and then refuse to air it, talk about it, or print it in your magazine pages. PLEASE! Humility is a virtue and if it convinces you any further, humility is a strengthening of your 'spirit'!
Comments? Anything you'd like to add? Or do you completely disagree? I'm going back to watch the DVD. Go Superman!
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